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16 Jul 2018

Neutered!

Haiku: 

Here's one of your balls.

You'll get the other one back

In 2020.

13 Jul 2018

Jerkin' the Gerkin

It's red, white, and blue,

Not red, white, and anal warts,

You immense douchebag!

10 Jul 2018
Haiku: 

I'm not gonna lie,

I really thought that by now,

I'd be President.

08 Jul 2018

Daddy Issues

Haiku: 

Ivanka's her name,

But she's Viagra to me.

Just a lot cheaper.

07 Jul 2018

Penis

Haiku: 

One of Trump's old tricks.

If you hold it with both hands,

It looks much bigger.

05 Jul 2018

Old Glory Hole

Haiku: 

Five minutes later,

The stars and stripes are sticky,

And the pole has crabs.

11 Jun 2018

Oh Canada!

It just isn't fair.

Canada gets his fine ass,

And we get an ass.

15 May 2018

Tickle #Metoo Elmo

Haiku: 

If Elmo had tits,

Would tickling him be assault?

And would it stop me?

10 May 2018

Shit Show

Haiku: 

Look at that moron.

So much shit spews from his mouth,

It needs a diaper.

06 May 2018

Dreamsicle

Haiku: 

That awkward moment,

When Donald Trump is impeached,

But you're still sucking.

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