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09 May 2017

Down Time

It isn't so bad.

Now I can binge watch snuff films,

And cook meth all day.

Haiku: 
08 May 2017

Pisstol Whipped

Come at me, Colbert!

But not literally though.

That's just for Putin.

Haiku: 
06 May 2017

Small Favors

Good news, gentlemen!

We still cover Viagra.

And that's about it.

Haiku: 
04 May 2017

Deplorable Care Act

Dear poor sick people.

You can all go fuck yourselves.

Love, Emperor Trump.

Haiku: 
02 May 2017

Barack to the Future

This job is fucking hard!

Barack made it look easy.

Can we get him back?

Haiku: 
01 May 2017

Oh Captain!

That awkward moment,

When you're against gay marriage,

And Chris Pine walks by.

Haiku: 
30 Apr 2017

Piglet

My son's so hamsome.

I think it's spelled "handsome", dad.

No. You taste like pork.

Haiku: 
27 Apr 2017

Access Denied!

That's the back door, Mike.

So unless it's your birthday,

You can stop knocking.

Haiku: 
25 Apr 2017

Rublestiltskin

Here's a secret, folks.

I don't know what I'm doing.

But I'm getting paid!

Haiku: 
24 Apr 2017

Red Wedding

Trump: Hello Siri.

Is Vladimir Putin gay?

Asking for a friend.

Haiku: 

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