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07 Nov 2017

No Glove, No Love

Haiku: 

You have two choices:

You hold my hand in public,

Or my dong at home.

01 Nov 2017

She-Rex

Haiku: 

Damnit! Kellyanne!

You were supposed to dress up,

So you don't scare kids.

31 Oct 2017

Staff Infection

Haiku: 

Halloween's scary!

There are lots of ghouls and ghosts.

And that's just my staff.

19 Oct 2017

Cheese Dip

Haiku: 

The way I see it,

He knew what he signed up for.

Now let's get nachos.

12 Oct 2017

Ryan Heir

Haiku: 

Tweet away, fuck boy,

I'm two impeachments away,

From running this bitch.

10 Oct 2017

Retweet

Haiku: 

Out on a Sunday,

Watching our favorite team,

The Baltimore Colts.

09 Oct 2017

The Two Ply Lie

Haiku: 

Our clean up effort:

These are super absorbent,

You'll be good as new.

05 Oct 2017

Faith Healer

Haiku: 

That awkward moment,

When you have to ask the Pope,

To cure your herpes.

02 Oct 2017

Losers Club

Haiku: 

Then Hillary said,

"We all float down here, Big Bill!"

And morphed into Trump.

28 Sep 2017

Super Bowl Champ

Haiku: 

Inappropriate!

We all know more shit comes out,

Than ever goes in.

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