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Trump

21 Aug 2018

Grunge Phase

Haiku: 

I'll bury this here,

Right next to my hopes and dreams.

It's better this way.

11 Aug 2018

OMFGU2?

Haiku: 

The secret code is:

IWANTTOFUCKYOURDAUGHTER.

Don't tell anyone.

06 Aug 2018

Above the Law

Haiku: 

I know Jui-Jitsu.

I grab pussies all the time.

Trust me, I'm your man.

19 Jul 2018

Mel Atonin'

Haiku: 

Melania thinks,

"There's no Botox for the soul,

To help me save face."

17 Jul 2018

Pootie's Cooties

Haiku: 

Let's put it this way,

We're going to need these gloves,

Just to shake your hand.

16 Jul 2018

Neutered!

Haiku: 

Here's one of your balls.

You'll get the other one back

In 2020.

08 Jul 2018

Daddy Issues

Haiku: 

Ivanka's her name,

But she's Viagra to me.

Just a lot cheaper.

07 Jul 2018

Penis

Haiku: 

One of Trump's old tricks.

If you hold it with both hands,

It looks much bigger.

05 Jul 2018

Old Glory Hole

Haiku: 

Five minutes later,

The stars and stripes are sticky,

And the pole has crabs.

15 May 2018

Tickle #Metoo Elmo

Haiku: 

If Elmo had tits,

Would tickling him be assault?

And would it stop me?

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